Against shame & unfair odds, I fought you
while all the while you despised me, belligerent.
I shuddered, shivering, would or did you care for us ?
yet I knew you hated us outright, with all the tidy inattention that smelled of you,
the clean & quite tidy corners
Of a sacred space. With incense and lit wicks, trembling.
And I fell, like a star smashing on the pavement !
…wishing oh dear Lord, that Eternity be placed, inside some ephemeral vessel!
« My dear darling, up and dancing awkwardly in a very vain place, where all is fake & fakery from one level to the next witnessing endlessly the spectacle underneath God's awful scrutiny.
It has no mystic use for you or me, nor does it ever consult our sweet bigotry.
It vibrates longitudinally in complete and resonant discompassion
across the temporal fibres wrinkling, the dead surface that insects thrive on.
There is nothing bold & wonderful! Nothing worth taking to the grave to ponder till doom's day.»
Pleading with all this in unkempt mind, we fight unjust battles for romantic reasons, without any favor from gods or demons or men or ghosts or those fickle titans hiding in the air we breathe, covered in hair & fur.
We fight rebellious bodies, our souls twitching in the wide & silly shooting range of sickly horreurs,
... embedded in the vernacular from the start of younger years defaced with time, the pure & unnatural innocence obliterated.
But now I know how forlorn it was arduously desiring to reduce you and your intangible pith into some soothing stale-mate articulated phrase.
Placing you in a tight and wholesome digestable frame:
to make a gruesome image of you in accordance with my disfigured light!
To make of you, a static sterile thing ! An Idolatrous revery. Into a barren idea of you and your numinous secret soil.
« Love is an ungrateful & abominous joy, can be unearthed from beyond the Aether. An inspired lovely brave and sometime solemn quintessential liqueur, inebriating the wakeful heart; yearning to quit at last that idle twittle sound! of murderous arrogant spleen. »
Reminds me of a poem by Jimmy Carroll, he of the Basketball Diary's, Wicked Gravity
Jim Carroll Band
Catholic Boy
Wicked Gravity
The gravity here is just sick for revenge
It's like my lungs are filled with chains . . .
The sky seems so low,
It hasn't moved this slow
Since the virgins, since the virgins went dancing for the rain
You know the stars in the night
They're like the holes in the cave
Like the ceiling of a bombed-out church
But gravity blocks my screams
It's like an enemy's dreams
My guardians quit
They quit before they started their search
Refrain:
I want a world without gravity
It could be just what I need
I'd watch the stars move close
I'd watch the earth recede
I wanna drift above the borders against my will
I wanna sleep where the angels don't pass
But now my lips are blue
Gravity does it to you
It's like they're pressed against a mirrored glass
I want my will and capability to meet inside the region
Where this gravity don't mean a thing
It's where the angels break through . . .
It's where they bring it to you
It's where silence, silence can teach me to sing
Repeat Refrain 2 times
I wanna lay beneath these sheets and never turn blue
I wanna hold you, hold you tight but never touch
I want some pure, pure white; hey, we can nod all night
We can do it without thinking too much
I want the dilettantes and parvenues to choke on my wit
They think the pearls I wear are pills
I want their gravity to shatter . . . but it really doesn't matter
I got something in my eye that kills!
Repeat Refrain
Wicked, wicked, wicked, wicked gravity . . .
Wicked, wicked, wicked, wicked gravity . . .
Wicked, wicked, wicked, wicked.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73QE3i8ZFiE
Mon chėre Soufi,
there's naught that's so sublime as that
which is the fertile, fervent mind.
I salute you sir, and your majestic, poetical command!